Cayetano Romero-Montoya

[Dewey]

Cayetano Romero-Montoya

Birthdate: November 8, 1992
Height: 5'11"
Weight: 160 lbs
Eye color: Dark Brown
Hair color: Black
Race: Colombian
Occupation: Street Pharmacy
Friends: Tristan, Paul ha
Enemies: Many


Cayetano (or 'Tano, as his family calls him) isn't as interested in the family business as his brothers and sisters. He's more of an artful person. He likes going to museums and art galleries to look at the exhibits. Not many people know this, but he's actually an artist himself. He knows his father and older brother would criticize him for it, though, so he keeps the canvases and art supplies in his room's closet. But he has showcased his work before at festivals, and has even had buyers. Cayetano is also very much a theatre and opera person. He couldn't possibly stand all the rap and hip hop popular these days. He prefers some Beethoven, Chopin, Mozart, and Vivaldi any day. He's sensitive and soft spoken and knows he's not gangster material, but still desperately seeks the approval of Alejandro Sr and Jr. But a recent confession about being confused over his sexual identity might prevent that from happening.

[Dewey]

((2017))

I finally did it. And it did not go well at all. It's taken me months to get to this point. I can't even tell you how many times I've sat in Paul's office and have just cried about realizing I'm not like my brothers. And I've dreaded this day since March, when the thought first crossed my mind during that Spring Break trip. I never thought I would tell anyone. I figured it could just be my little secret, because I was so ashamed about it. But Paul has worked with me and has encouraged me to express myself. And I do want to be open and honest with people. I do want to be myself. I want my family to know that I love to paint, and that I've showed pieces at art shows. I want them to know about my hobbies and passions. I'm just so afraid to reveal it all, though. Would they be happy? Would they be proud of me? Would they be supportive?

I took the biggest step in resolving these issues yesterday and it didn't go at all as I had planned. I told Dad and AJ and Tristan that I wanted to meet with them all. And... I came out to them. I told them everything, and about the confused sexual identity thing. And...I don't know. It was the most awful idea I've ever had. Dad seemed disappointed. He specifically told me to not parade it around. And AJ. Well, you know AJ. He's a control freak. He always has to be right, and you have to do what he says or he'll throw some guilt trip at you. He told me I was ruining Dad and the family because of this, and that we'd be the laughing stock of the city. In short, they both hurt me. A lot. I wanted to just leave the house, but I couldn't. Where would I go anyway?

Tristan was at least supportive. I think he's still irked by it all, which is understandable, but he at least still talked to me civilly and didn't treat me any different. And then I told Yeimy. She was really great about it. She said she was glad I'm happy and thanked me for telling her. I even told her about Ethan, and she said she'd like to meet him. So that's good. AJ still wants to go downtown later tonight, because he's convinced I'll change my mind by watching girls take off their clothes. I don't know how to explain it, though. It just doesn't do anything for me. I hope he comes to accept that...

[Dewey]

((2017))

Tomorrow Yeimy is going to meet Ethan. I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous about the entire situation. I'm not even sure what all the anxiety is about. I guess it's typical, though. Your first family member meeting your first...well, I don't even know what to call Ethan. Right now we're only friends, but it's obviously been implied we're pursuing the same interests. Not even implied; deliberately spoken. Just like a straight guy and girl who go on "dates"--obviously it's to see if something will come between them. And while I can't say that Ethan and I have called our get-together's "dates", I still think it's implied. Sure, it's only been lunch at Panera a few times, and going to Barnes & Nobles that one time after, but our conversations have been all about getting to know each other, and the time has been all about enjoying each other's company. I don't know. Am I getting ahead of myself? I don't even have anyone to talk to about these things. I feel like such a burden on Yeimy because I'm just not sure if she's comfortable with the conversation or not. It's been hard. I haven't really spoken to dad or my brothers since the "confession". Maybe I can talk to dad tonight...

I think they would like Ethan if they just gave him a chance. He's even a medical student. That could help out the business, couldn't it? He could give us access to drugs, at least. Although I would never ask him to do something that illegal. Still, it's a reason for them to like him. His promiximity to the pharmacy business. Anyway, I just hope Yeimy likes him when they meet tomorrow. I'm really praying for it, even. It's so difficult when you're going through this major identity awareness alone, and she's really been the most supportive. Tristan, too, but he would probably flip out if I told him there was someone in the picture already.

[Dewey]

((2017))

I haven't written in a while. It looks like the last time I wrote, Yeimy was going to meet Ethan. She did, and it was a success. I knew they would get along. They're both very friendly. However, the tete-a-tete ended short when Alejandro and Tristan made a cameo. Of all the restaurants they could have stopped at, it had to be the one we were at. It would appear my luck has run out. Alejandro, in his typical power-hungry ways, immediately assumed control of the situation (while making a scene, of course) and practically ordered Yeimy and I to get up and leave with him. I don't know why, but every time he becomes authoritative like that, I just bottle up and oblige him. I can't ever find the voice to argue with him, and arguing with him wouldn't help anyway. Alejandro is stubborn and set in his ways. You can never change his mind. So, in short, I left with him without even saying anything to Ethan, and that's how the night ended.

Ethan was upset with me for a while. It killed me to realize that. He told me that I needed to stand up for myself, that I'm twenty-five years old and need to stop acting like a submissive child because Alejandro is not the master of my life. I know he's right, but it's just so hard. My family is very close-knit, and I feel as if I'm disrupting that unity by...diverging from the norm, I guess. I want Alejandro and Dad to accept who I am and I want their approval.

But it looks as if I'll never get it. I invited Ethan over for Thanksgiving. That was the worst idea yet, I now see. I told Ethan they knew he was coming, but I lied. Alejandro, Tristan, Yeimy, Dad...none of them knew. I didn't mean to cause any drama; I really didn't. I just wanted them all to meet him, to get to know him, to like him. Alejandro could not be stopped, though. He told Ethan he was not "welcomed" in the house. And then Dad asked to speak with me privately, and he told me that Andre Tagliatti was blackmailing our family with my secret, and that if it ever got out, our family would be seen as weak. I told him I couldn't be someone I'm not, and he said that I was already being someone I'm not, and that I should just go see my shrink, and listen to the millions of answers he'd give me.

That really hurt. How could he say something like that? It makes me so angry that the family is being blackmailed because of me; why is this something people frown upon? Why would my family be considered weak because I rather spend time with Ethan instead of one of the girls Alejandro is always throwing at me? I thought people in France would be more open-minded, but this city and its families are clearly set in their old fashioned ways, and that makes me the black sheep yet again.

[Dewey]

It's been an awful night, through and through. I was in the apartment, just painting, finishing up a piece that will be apart of a showcase at an art exhibit in a few weeks. Suddenly, Ethan came in, and he looked absolutely horrible. He had a black eye, a busted lip, and a few bruises across his body. His clothes were practically ruined. I was beside myself! I thought he'd been mugged--a number of homeless people solicit just outside the hospital entrance, and Alexandria Bay Medical Center is downtown, in a rich area, which means there's also a lot of homelessness and crimes. It makes me nervous knowing Ethan works late hours in those neighborhoods.

But nothing could prepare me for finding out the truth: that my own brothers had done this to Ethan. Alejandro and his horrible thugs did this, as an expression of their hate for him, and for our "lifestyle". I felt awful. I felt disgusted by Alejandro's homophobia. Ethan's family was clearly upset, and I don't blame them. However, to avenge Ethan's pain, they in a way held me hostage. It wasn't exactly the most pleasing experience. I'm in no way involved with my family's business. I've tried to win Alejandro and Dad's approval, I've tried to become involved in the business...but they simply won't accept me. It's unfair to be marked as a Montoya when my own family ostracises me.

And now they're threatening to come between Ethan and myself. After such a difficult night, I'm not sure what Ethan's feelings are. I feel as if I will lose him...

[Dewey]

Wow, it's been five or six months since I last updated. Things haven't really been going that well. Ever since A.J. and his thugs cornered Ethan at Alexandria Bay Medical Center and beat him up, there's been this big distance between us. Between Ethan and me, that is. Though, of course there's also been distance between me and my family.

Ethan: I don't know how it happened. One day, we just stopped talking as much as we used to, even though we've been sharing an apartment for the past few months. One day, there just.. wasn't anything there anymore. It's depressing to think about. I've been talking to Paul about it, and I think we just spent more time fighting for our relationship than actually having one. We wanted so badly to make it work that we just pursued the relationship at all costs. This isn't to say I don't care about Ethan. I do. I care about him a lot. But I don't think either of us is ready to actually have a relationship right now. He's doing his intern work now and is busy 24/7, and I'm.. well I'm not doing much, really, but I'm still dealing with the "coming out" thing, and all the drama with my family is just too much to handle right now. I'm way in over my head. I need to step away from everything and just take a chance to breathe, to work on myself. It sucks... but I think Ethan feels the same way. Neither of have wanted to say anything, though. Like I said, we just wanted it to work simply because there was so much opposition.

Family: Dad actually came to my art show. I told Paul about this, and even he was surprised. He said I've done good work, though, asserting myself and taking the initiative with my family. Paying my dad a visit, and expressing myself openly to him is very important right now, he said. And I excelled with flying colors. I was pretty surprised to see Dad, too. But I was overjoyed. I rushed over to him, and realized I had to contain myself so I didn't look like an idiot. There was so much I wanted to share with him, though. I wanted to show him each and every painting I'd done, and talk to him about my style, and the history of my style, and how many pieces I've sold up to date, and the successes I've had. Sometimes I get so tongue-tied in his presence, though. He's pretty intimidating, and I desperately want to impress him and have his approval. I think I got an iota of approval yesterday. He told me the paintings were nice, and he stuck around for a while and we were able to talk. He even praised an idea I offered about...well, I should probably leave that out of this journal.

Anyway, even though my first relationship with a guy has been a disappointment, I feel like I'm making progress with my family. They haven't completely ousted me. I don't have to feel like the prodigal son anymore. I think I'll speak with Dad today about possibly coming home, and working more with the family business. It's a big time in my life right now, and I'm glad I don't have to be alone.